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- This doesn’t make any sense but holds you back every day
This doesn’t make any sense but holds you back every day
This is one of the most true things I know…
…but also one of the hardest things to live by.
The Spotlight Effect
Most people don't really care about you.
The Spotlight Effect says that we overestimate the degree to which other people are noticing our actions.
This is liberating—stop worrying about what others think, be yourself, and live according to your values.
— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom)
1:39 PM • Dec 24, 2022
People are full of themselves.
And very few walk around thinking about you all the time.
Like back in the day when I was a soon-to-be top shelf ice hockey player (in my and my mother’s opinion).
Every game I made 100 mistakes. You know, bad passes, got sent to the “sin-bin” (2 minutes’ suspension), missed once-in-a-lifetime scoring opportunities.
I never played a good game in my own eyes. And after every game walking back to the locker room (win or lose) I got mentally ready for a, “what the fudge were you doing out there?!”
But you what?
Never happened.
Why?
Because everyone was thinking the same.
They’d been out there for 3x20 minutes and made 100 mistakes themselves. And they were walking back to the locker room getting ready for the same beat up.
We were all full of ourselves.
So what to do?
For me, I need to do something.
You know, like tattooing “People don’t care about you” on my forehead so I see it every time I look in the mirror. Or say it out loud 100 times each morning to get it into my little head.
Bad jokes aside, I think it’s one of those things you just do.
Do your own stuff.
Do things you think people around you will care about. And when you do, you’ll realize they don’t and you’ll slowly internalize it over time.
Before you know it, you’ll have the tattoo on your forehead.
But only for you to see.
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